Saturday, September 1, 2012

Coal Found Deposited in SWISS BANK


Coal in gunnysack found deposited in Swiss bank
Hindustan Times
New Delhi, September 01, 2012
In a major development that has given a new ammunition to the opposition over Coalgate in India, Swiss bank authorities have confirmed that they have recovered dozens of gunnysacks filled with coal in their lockers, which are normally used to store precious jewels or antique items.








We received an emailsome self-styled WikiLeaks supporter group that claimed to have put up bombs in our lockers to teach us a lesson for not releasing names of those who have secret accounts with us,” an official with the Swiss bank informed how the coal was found.
“We didn’t want to take any risk so we did a quick search of every locker, and were shocked to find some gunnysacks filled with coal,” the official said, “Since coal has proved to be very explosive back in India, we thought we’d stay away from it.”
The Swiss bank officials remained silent, as part of their policy, over the identity of the person or the entity that owned the lockers.
Meanwhile back in India, BJP has claimed that recovery of coal in Swiss bank has nailed the lie of Kapil Sibal and P Chidambaram, who claimed “zero loss” because coal had not been mined and taken out of the earth.
“Not only it was taken out of the mines, it was taken out of India. The Prime Minister must resign now!” demanded BJP leader Sushma Swaraj.
The BJP leader claimed that only an Indian would know the value of coal and thus the locker clearly belonged to an Indian. She further claimed that the silence of the Swiss bank official over ownership of the locker meant that the locker belonged to Prime Minister Manmohan Singh.
“Silence means Manmohan Singh,” Ms.Swaraj argued.
On the other hand, Congress leader Digvijaya Singh claimed that the whole event was a conspiracy by RSS.
“No bomb was found in the Swiss bank, which means that someone spread a rumour, and we all know that RSS spreads rumors,” Digvijaya Singh came up with his logic, “The coal belongs to Reddy Brothers and the account was of a BJP leader.”

*SPOOF ALERT! The contents of this page were created by Rahul Roushan, founder-editor of Faking News, a leading Indian news satire website. This is a parody of a frontpage of Hindustan Times and is done with a belief that the authorities will accommodate parody and humour in the right spirit and not block Hindustan Times instead!
ABOVE ARTICLE?\/NEWS PUBLISHED IN HT NEWSPAPER IS NOTHING BUT FAKING NEWSFAKING NEWS

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